Recently I have reflected on a book called “The Dream Giver”. This is the story of Ordinary from the land of Familiar who one day sets out to discover and live his “Big Dream”. Now this is a significant undertaking as his day to day existence has become the recurring pattern that is his life, ordinary and familiar. He heads out into the unknown…for something more.
Think about all the excuses you use to trip yourself up when you set out to make a change in your life, even the apparently small ones. Just to get out the door we need to overcome our own limiting beliefs, negative self talk and many other factors than can squash the dreams we have.
Ordinary is no different, but he gets out the door. Strength builds, confidence rises, the dream becomes a little more real. Then… the Border Bullies arrive.
Ever have a dream and summon the courage to share it with someone who very quickly dumps all over it giving you every opinion they have on why it will not work or why you are not capable or why…you insert the reason. These are Border Bullies. They stand at the border between you moving forward towards your big dream and turning back to Familiar as Ordinary. They can be just about anyone; a family member, a friend, perhaps the person you would least expect it to be. The comments and actions of the border bullies are often unconsciously made without realizing the potential impact they have. Often it is a reflection of their own fears and not much to do with you at all. But you do hear it. All that internal support you have built up may come crashing down around you. You may even abandon your dream completely and return to your land of Familiar and live on in an ordinary existence. It happens all the time. It may have already happened to you. In one form or another at one degree or another we have all probably experienced this…and probably not liked it very much.
Ordinary ran into Border Bullies. He questioned his actions, his capabilities, his dream. Then he met Champion.
Champion believes in you and is excited about the adventure you are embarking upon. He wants you to live your big dream, your ideal life, a life far beyond ordinary. Champion will give whatever support you need. Champion is not simply an enabler. He will give you guidance and support but also help keep you on track too.
Who are the champions in your life? Certain friends, family members, or colleagues may fit the bill. On another level might be your health, life, or business coach, and trainer.
As you go about your day to day life think about our friend Ordinary and his journey. Are you like Ordinary? Is your day to day life like being in the land of Familiar? Do you want more? Do you have a big dream, an inkling inside of something more or bigger that you are meant to be, do, or have. What is holding you back from getting it; your border bullies? How much time do you spend with your border bullies allowing their influence over your life to take control? Conversely how much time do you spend with your champions soaking up all they have for you?
Not many champions, you say. Internal support leads to external support. When you begin to take steps to take care of yourself then your champions will appear. Keep yourself down and you will create a perfect environment for the border bullies to thrive. I don’t think that is much of a way to live. Take care of yourself first. Embrace the champions who are already there or who come around. Spend more time with them. Know who your border bullies are. Understand how they aim to keep you down, often very unconsciously. Learn how you use them to keep yourself down. Spend less time with them or better yet figure out how to have your border bullies become your champions.
This will make a world of difference in your ability to experience living in bliss. Have a wonderful day.